A couple of weeks ago my Mom asked me when I was going to ‘get a real job’. After I scraped my jaw up off the floor, I reminded her through tightly clenched teeth that “I already have a REAL job…and haven’t I explained that fifty-eleven times already”? Yesterday another well-meaning relative handed me a ‘want-ad’ from a company looking to hire a full time web designer. Hmmmmm….I am not a web designer, nor am I looking for another full time job.
Why do our parents, gal pals, spouses, siblings and kids seem to have the hardest time understanding what we do? And what can we do about it? Buckle up! It’s time for:
The Brainy Gals’ Guide to Getting Friends and Family on Board with your Biz:
- Cut them some slack. Let’s face it – being a Virtual Assistant is probably not something they’ve ever heard of or dreamed of you becoming. They might be worried that you no longer have a steady pay check, benefits or job security. They might even think you’re a little bit crazy. Guess what? They’re right! By starting your own business you are among a rare breed. Forgive them for worrying and take some time to show them your business plans, talk about your goals and explain to them your ‘back-up plan’ to ensure you won’t ‘go hungry’ while you’re building your business.
- Recognize when it’s really the Green-Eyed Monster. Often when friends or relatives are ‘hating on your business’ it’s really because they are envious. Most of the world is far too afraid to quit their 60-hour a week cushy corporate jobs. You are a brave, unique, trail-blazer who is suddenly living the life that everyone else wishes for. Be proud to be a rebel! Try very hard not to be snobby or defensive about it and most importantly, don’t be discouraged.
- Let them help. Ask for their opinions on your branding, allow them to brainstorm ideas with you. Perhaps the kids could lick stamps or sharpen your pencils? It can be difficult (especially for older generations) to understand what WordPress or Social Media or Google Analytics are or how you can make money using them? It’s not your job to teach peeps about technology…but the more your family feels ‘involved’ in your biz, the more they will eventually understand. Sometimes they are simply afraid of losing you. Openly share your successes and failures and soon they will be your biggest cheerleaders.
- Celebrate with them! Nothing will appease your family more than knowing you are having success in your business. Invite them to dinner to celebrate signing a new client or taking a big step with your business. Seeing your small successes will ease help to ease their fears – and get them as excited about your biz as you are.
So grit your teeth and smile and carry on this rocky road of Virtual Assistance. Keep in mind the infamous words of Ralph Waldo Emerson:
“Is it so bad, then, to be misunderstood? Pythagoras was misunderstood, and Socrates, and Jesus, and Luther, and Copernicus, and Galileo, and Newton, and every pure and wise spirit that ever took flesh. To be great is to be misunderstood.”
Got a great or really fun one-liner from a friend or relative who didn’t ‘get’ your business? Share it in the comments!
This is so funny and true! I enjoyed reading this!
I can definitely relate to this.
~Kim Harris~
I think most of us can! A lot of my V.A. buddies have had this experience so I thought it might be worthy of a blog post. Thanks for commenting Kim,
XO
You’re welcome!
I can relate too! Especially as it’s been really frustrating given I am still at the start of my business and I could really use the encouragement from those I love. I really like the idea of involving them and celebrating with them. Maybe this will help them feel part of it and they will start to see it as I do. Thanks Brainy Gal. Great blog.
You’re welcome Maria! And you go girl…prove everybody wrong by building a wildly successful business. XO
Imagine discussing your business with such enthusiasm, beaming with joy about your passion. Now imagine the blank stare of your friends/family, while the only sound you hear is a crickets’ symphony.
There are many of us who can relate indeed. Despite being misunderstood, we press on toward continued success.
LOL Naomi…I’m quite familiar with the crickets chirping! Love it.
XO
Great blog post! I can so relate! I’ve just resigned from a full-time job after nearly six years and when I tell people I’m going to work from home, they look at me like I’ve totally lost my mind! Even when I explain what I will be doing, I can see the look that says ‘so you’re going to be home doing nothing then’! *sigh*!
Anyway, I’ll show ‘em! Onwards and upwards!
Yay Ann-Marie! I know that look you speak of. But we can change it. My husband used to give me that look but now I catch him ‘bragging’ about me and see the look of pride when I show him some of my accomplishments. Keep on Keepin’ On. XO
Does your mom read your blog? LOL! Maybe she’ll be more sensitive next time. I think a lot of people just don’t get it! It’s rare that folks can step out of their comfort zones to achieve their dreams. Thank goodness we meet like-minded friends online!
Rock On!
Jen
I was wondering if she would read it Jen! I agree – we have to stick together in this nutty profession. Nice to have people who understand us. Thks for commenting! XO
Hi Lisa!
I enjoyed reading your article. It’s totally true. My family and my friends don’t understand it. They probably think I just like to spend time in front of the computer.
Thanks so much Yaritza! I think eventually everyone will ‘get’ it when we tell them what we do…but in the meantime we’ll have to just ‘show’ them. Best of luck!
Lisa
Lisa – Boy can I relate. I grew up on a dairy farm in Southern NJ and when my family comes to visit they totally ignore the fact that while I am “downstairs”, I am at work. They act as if I am just hanging out. I find that they also use this as an excuse for not calling me. “I didn’t know if you would be working or not”. And boy oh boy….I mistakenly told them about my hourly rate and they hit the roof. They couldn’t believe that someone would pay that much money for a “glorified cleaning woman”.
I have found that the less I tell them, the better off I am. What they hear is that business is great – and I let them wonder how much my paycheck was this week
I have a small group of friends who are also Entrepreneurs and they are who I share my stories – good and bad – for advice and support.
Linda Clevenger http://www.organizationdirect.com
Your blog is so encouraging for a starter like me. Keep topics like this coming Lisa
Thanks so much Tet…will keep them coming! XO